# The Legend Of The Singing Swordsman

(With various notes)

By Tun Kai Poh.

## 69 AD, Southern China
The Time of the Lotus

"Master Yong Fo of the Flying Steel School, you are hereby forbidden by Imperial decree to teach the 'Twin Spinning Swords of Legend' technique to any person or persons within the boundaries of the Middle Kingdom! Drop your weapons and come with us at once or URRrrkkkk!!!"

A dimly lit forest clearing. The smell of spring in the air. A disemboweled eunuch lying in the grass.

Steely-eyed, the elderly Yong Fo swung his bloodstained sword into position above his head and gazed at his opponents: A dozen archers with their bows ready to fire, four eunuch bureaucrats, obviously uneasy away from the luxuries of the Imperial City, and their leader, a stern, blackbearded warrior dressed in the armor of a captain of the Imperial Guard.

"You will pay for your impudence!" shouted the captain. "How do you expect to defeat my superior sword technique? I am Kan Lam, master of the Biting Sword, and I shall end your villainous ways!"

Yong Fo laughed the laugh of a weary veteran, who has seen more battle than most generals can ever remember. "When is it villainy to teach selfdefense ?"

"You teach rebellion, mongrel dog!"

The swordmaster shook his head. "Rebellion against the tyranny of your eunuch masters is righteous. You may strike me down, but a hundred will rise to replace me."

"Striking you down is merely the beginning," replied Kan Lam, drawing his sword. "When you are in chains, I will hunt down all your students, and kill them. Then I will kill their parents, and their wives, and their brothers and sisters. I will kill their children, and their servants, and their livestock, and then -"

Enraged, Yong Fo leaped into the air, his blade held before him: "Shut up and fight!"

The archers loosed a hail of arrows, but Yong Fo's nimble feet merely danced over each shaft as he flew forward in mid-air. He tore into the bowmen and slashed his way through them.

"Enough!" shouted Kan Lam. "Now taste my 'Rage Of The Dragon's Fire Tongue' attack!" He leaped into the air to meet Yong Fo, and their swords crossed twenty times.

"'The Steel Spirit Shields The Righteous!'" riposted Yong Fo, spiralling into the sky with a mighty leap, while deflecting Kan Lam's blows with his blurred sword.

"Ha! Is that all you can do, old man? 'The Hissing Adder Strikes Swiftly!'" Kan Lam jumped up in pursuit, thrusting with his sword. Blood spurted from a wound in Yong Fo's thigh. First blood had been drawn. The two warriors continued to battle, flying higher and higher into the sky.

Ignoring the whiny cheers of the eunuchs who watched below, Yong Fo planted his feet against the upper branches of a tree and changed the direction of his flight. Kan Lam also bounced off a branch, following with a cry of "'The Wily Fox Stalks The Clucking Hen!'".

"I hate these stupid technique names," grumbled Yong Fo to himself as he spun around in midair to parry the attacks of the Imperial Guardsman.

Suddenly, a white-hot spear of fire leaped up from the hands of a eunuch, blasting Yong Fo out of the air. As he crashed to the forest floor he cursed himself for forgetting about the magical powers of the sinister eunuchs who secretly controlled the Empire.

"Forgive me, Quan Lo. I have failed..."

Then Kan Lam's boot smashed into his face and he knew darkness.

In the nearby village of Jing, the local magistrate held court. Before him, a dirty peasant cowered before the accusations of an obese landlord. The charge was theft.

"This filthy rat stole two katties of rice from my own kitchen!"

"Please, honorable magistrate, I merely sought to feed my hungry wife and sons..." pleaded the young farmer. He suddenly yelped as the landlord kicked him where he knelt.

"I have heard enough," said the magistrate, as he gathered his robes about him and stood up. "Gan Wei, you have failed to pay your landlord for three months now, and this act of thievery is the last straw. You should have worked harder to increase the bounty of your landlord, in which case you would not have had to steal food."

"But your honor, a plague of locusts destroyed my harvest last year! How could I feed my family, let alone pay what I owe the landlord?"

The magistrate snorted. "Your pitiful excuses mean nothing to me. Guards, take him out and whip him. This man will be an indentured servant to his landlord for the next two years. Bring me the next case!"

Hiding in the back room, Li Ling peered through a crack in the wall and watched her father deal out his harsh justice to the poor villagers. For years, she had witnessed her father's cruelty, but she had never spoken out, for it was not her place to do so.

Today was different.

Today, the fury unbecoming of a woman rose up inside her, and she felt the need to talk to somebody, anybody. How could she honor her father when he mercilessly oppressed these people? Many years ago, when she was still a child, she had even played by the lily pond with Gan Wei and the girl who would grow up to be his wife. But time had parted them, as her father became town magistrate and forbade her to mix with the other children. "A faithful daughter should stay at home," was one of his favorite sayings.

Auntie Lin would understand. No, the eccentric old herbalist wasn't really her aunt, but she had gotten her nickname because of the wise, knowing advice she gave out with her potions and herbs. Whenever Li Ling needed to open her heart to someone, Auntie Lin had been there.

She stole out the back door of the courthouse and stopped by the back of the house she lived in with her father. "Amah!" she called out to the housemaid. "Tell papa I'm going down to the river to visit Auntie Lin!"

It was a fine, warm spring day. Li Ling had left most of the village behind. Lin's hut was located upstream, at the edge of Jing. Many people said that the willow trees behind the hut contributed to its good feng shui, which probably explained why Auntie Lin's herbalist business had become one of the most famous and well-frequented in the region. Despite her wealth and prosperity, however, Lin always donated most of her earnings to temples and charity, preferring to keep her life simple and unencumbered by material things.

There was smoke up ahead.

"Noooo!!!" came the cry from behind the hut. "Not the trees!"

Li Ling broke into a run.

The burning willows came into view. A dozen brigands in odd purple garb waved their swords and torches menacingly. Auntie Lin lay on the ground, weeping at the destruction of the grove. Her hut had been ransacked, the powders and herbs scattered in the dirt.

One of the bandits saw Li Ling.

"Run, Li Ling, run!" shouted Lin. But it was too late.

Li Ling ducked as the sword whistled towards her, and felt it cut the end of her ponytail.

"Hey, that's the worst haircut I ever got!" She kicked the man in the shins, sending him tumbling. She turned to run, then realised that it would be impossible. She was surrounded.

"Heh-heh, come on, pretty girl..." leered one of the brigands.

The wind changed. The smoke drifted north. For a moment, all was silent.

"'A thousand leagues my sword will fly,
A thousand battles I shall fiiiight!
A thousand foes shall be cleaved,
A thousand maidens shall be freeeeed!'"

It was the worst singing she had ever heard.

A man in green robes hurtled over the burning grove, a longsword in his hand. He landed beside her in the midst of the bandits and crossed swords with each of them a dozen times. He was a blur of steel and silk.

"Aha! Take that and that and that, you dastardly thieves!" He disarmed a bandit and snatched the man's sword out of the air before it could hit the ground.

"'Twin Spinning Swords Of Legend!'" he sang, slashing with both blades in all directions. His whirlwind of steel caught many of the bandits unprepared, and they died horribly. The four surviving bandits broke and ran, but with a single amazing leap he had cut them off.

If his deadly prowess was terrifying enough, his singing was even worse. Li Ling caught snatches of song in between the clashing of swords, and wished she hadn't. It wasn't just his skill that was killing the men, for a couple of them actually doubled over and collapsed on their own, choking on their own tongues.

"'Lai la lai la lai, I am a great swordsman/Lai la lai la -' Huh? Where did they go?" The swordsman stood alone, bloody corpses littered around him.

"Uh, thank you, whoever you are," said Li Ling. "You saved our lives."

"Oh, no problem, no problem at all. I was just travelling through, to meet my old teacher, when I heard the old woman's cries. Always ready to lend a helping hand." The swordsman grinned and cleaned his sword. "By any chance do you see any blood on my moustache? Because I think I smell some, and I hate it when that happens."

Auntie Lin had picked herself up and was standing at the edge of the grove, sadly watching the fire die down. Li Ling ignored the swordsman and went to Lin's side.

"I'm sorry, Auntie. Why would anyone do this?"

The swordsman spoke up: "Perhaps we should question the bandits."

"Wonderful idea!" cried Lin, "I suppose you can speak to spirits?"

"Oh. Right. Sorry," mumbled the swordsman sheepishly.

"It doesn't matter. Whoever hired these thugs got what he wanted. The grove is gone, and the feng shui flow has been corrupted." The old woman went back to her hut and started picking up the scattered herbs. "I'll rebuild; what else to do?"

The swordsman looked around. "Where am I, anyway?"

"The village of Jing," replied Li Ling.

"Then I'm ten leagues off course. Must hurry off to meet my teacher!" With a powerful leap, he flew off into the air. Before Li Ling could even ask him his name, he was gone.

It was night. The magistrate and his daughter were having dinner with a special guest.

"The Singing Swordsman? Indeed, I have heard much of him," grumbled the magistrate's guest. "As you know, I and my entourage are on my way to the Imperial City to deliver a recently captured criminal."

"Yes," said the magistrate, "The swordmaster is being held in the cage in the village square. My men will see to it that he does not escape tonight."

"His name is Yong Fo, a master swordsman who incites rebellion against our glorious Emperor. In his time, he has taught his villainous arts to many bandits and rogues. The Singing Swordsman is one such student."

The magistrate turned to his daughter. "You hear that, Li Ling? You're lucky to be alive."

"But papa, he saved me and Auntie Lin from those bandits!"

"Hah, it must have been some ploy of his. Who knows, perhaps he had a murderous grudge against the other bandits. Go on, Captain."

Kan Lam drank another cup of wine and continued: "Some years ago, in the Imperial City, there was a student of the Imperial Opera Troupe, a singer by the name of Goh, who was thrown out due to his lack of talent. Yong Fo found him wandering the streets and taught him swordplay. Now, Goh is a deadly killer, wanted throughout the Middle Kingdom for over two hundred murders. He has killed many Imperial soldiers, as well as the eunuch governor of the Wan province. They say he belongs to a secret society dedicated to overthrowing the Emperor. The man is unbalanced, and quite insane."

"See?" said the magistrate, "What a wise man our guest is! Li Ling, you should be honored to meet Kan Lam. In fact, I invited him here for a very special reason. Don't you think he would make a fine husband?"

Li Ling gasped in shock. Kan Lam was almost twice her age, and he was a brute of a man. Just watching him eat disgusted her. His beard dripped with juices as he bit into a portion of meat. And Li Ling didn't particularly like anyone who served in the Imperial Guard, for Auntie Lin had once told her that the soldiers served their own greed and corruption.

"Servant!" Kan Lam called to Amah, "Bring me more dogmeat."

"'I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy,
Because it's eeeeasy come, eeeeasy go,
Little high, little low...'"

The young man staggered through the rain-drenched streets of the Imperial city. It always seemed to be raining. It matched his spirits.

Why? Why had he been cheated of his dreams? He had come to the city to join the most prestigious opera troupe in the land, to pursue his ambition to be a great singer. Singing was in his blood; he even liked to talk in song, sometimes. But he had been rejected. He had no money, no home, no dream.

It was then that the street hoods jumped him, tearing his robes from his body, searching him for valuables. He did not resist; how could he? The only thing that mattered to him was the opera. And now that was lost to him.

"Stop! Begone from here, you low felons! How dare you prey on the weak and miserable?" A middle-aged man with a sword chased the thieves away into the night, and lent Goh a hand.

"Here, boy. What's the matter?"

Goh told him, in tears, of his shattered dreams.

"There, boy, don't cry. The world is full of dreams. If you lose one, choose another."

"What is your dream?" asked Goh.

"What? Why, I wish that all the people of the Middle Kingdom could be free. I am Yong Fo, a swordsman, and I fight for all the oppressed people of the world."

And it was then that a new dream came upon Goh. He would be a heroic swordsman, like in the great operas. A warrior of legend, fighting evil wherever he could find it.

"Teach me, Master Yong Fo! I want to be a swordsman! 'Lai la lai la lai, I want to be a great swordsman/Lai la lai la -'"

A hand gently touched his shoulder.

"Waaauuugghh!!!" screamed the Swordsman as he awoke.

"Waaauuugghh!!!" screamed Li Ling, jumping back.

The Singing Swordsman looked around. It was still night in the graveyard where he had holed up for the night.

"Are you crazy, girl, waking me up like that?"

"You must be the crazy one, sleeping in a graveyard. Aren't you afraid of spirits or ghosts?"

"Me? I fear nothing! Besides, it's a good hiding place. Nobody comes to graveyards at night. Why are you here, and how did you find me?"

Li Ling hesitated. "Well, my father wants me to marry a horrid man, so I sneaked out to Auntie Lin's hut to talk to her, but on the way back, I passed the graveyard and heard you singing in your sleep, on my mother's grave."

"Me? Sing in my sleep?" He reddened. "Your mother's...whoops."

"You're The Singing Swordsman, aren't you? Captain Kan Lam told me that you're a murderer. Is that true?"

"Lies! I'm fighting against the Lotus for freedom! I - wait, Kan Lam? Of the Imperial Guard?"

"I - my father is the local magistrate, and Kan Lam and his prisoner, Yong Fo, are staying at our village. My father wants to marry me off to Kan Lam."

"I have to rescue Yong Fo! He was my teacher, and I owe everything to him! I suppose you'll want to warn Kan Lam?" He leaned toward her menacingly.

"No, I won't. I don't care at all for him. But tell me, what were you saying about the 'Lotus'?"

The Singing Swordsman narrowed his eyes and looked into the distance. "The Eaters of the Lotus are a sorcerous conspiracy of eunuchs who seek to control and corrupt the Middle Kingdom. They are the true power behind the Imperial throne. My master Yong Fo leads a movement to destroy the power of the Lotus, with the help of a mysterious secret society called the Golden Candle. Yong Fo once told me that he comes from a far away place in the future where China is no longer ruled by the Lotus. I don't understand it all, but as a hero, I must fight alongside him. You know, I once wrote a song about our heroic struggle; it goes: -"

"Uh, never mind the song," interrupted Li Ling hurriedly. "That's the most ridiculous story I've ever heard! Sorcerous eunuchs indeed!"

There was a high-pitched laugh, from the other end of the graveyard.

"What was that?"

The Swordsman drew his sword. "You've been followed! Dammit, you've led my enemy right to me!"

A robed eunuch, one of Kan Lam's followers, stepped into the moonlight and laughed again. "I followed the girl because I suspected she might have dealings with that Dragon alchemist we were trying trying to ruin. As it turns out, I've found The Singing Swordsman, the man who has meddled with so many of our efforts! Prepare to die!"

A dozen corpses lurched into sight: the very bandits who had destroyed the willow grove!

"So," said the Swordsman, "Your vassals were behind the attack on the old woman's home!"

Li Ling stared open-eyed. "Those - those things..."

"Yes, they're walking corpses, brought back to serve the Lotus once more. But they shall not avail against the righteousness of my sword!" The Singing Swordsman leaped into battle, singing a little ditty about plums and peaches as he lopped off rotting limbs.

An undead bandit lunged at Li Ling. She ducked and ran, only to trip on an old shovel lying by a gravestone. The walking corpse was only a few feet away when she finally summoned up enough courage to pick up the shovel and smash the creature's head off with it.

The eunuch became aware that his undead servitors were being rapidly destroyed, and turned to run and warn Kan Lam. Li Ling saw this.

"Swordsman! The eunuch is getting away!" shouted Li Ling.

"No, he's not! 'Spider Snares Robin!'" From the sleeve of his robe, The Singing Swordsman flung one end of a long silk scarf, which wrapped around the eunuch's leg, tripping him. The eunuch's head banged against a gravestone, knocking him out.

The battle was over, and the corpses had been destroyed. The Swordsman stopped singing and put his sword away. Li Ling stared at the remains of the walking corpses, then at the eunuch, then at the Singing Swordsman.

"Now do you believe me?" he asked.

The rooster crowed the morning for all of Jing village to hear. It was time for Kan Lam and his entourage to leave. The Imperial Guardsman stepped into the village square and gazed scornfully at the battered old man who lay within the wicker cage hanging from the tree in the middle of the square.

The magistrate approached and bowed. "I hope you will return from the Imperial City soon to claim my daughter as your wife. It would be a most auspicious marriage."

"Yes, indeed," replied Kan Lam, his attention elsewhere. He turned to his eunuch followers. "Has anyone seen Deng?"

At that moment, Yong Fo awoke.

"Ah, good morning, impudent old fool! Soon, we shall deliver your head to Gao Zhang, and we will see what he has to say to you before he sends you to the Underworld!"

"Your arrogance will be your downfall, Lotus pawn. The Golden Candle is stronger than you think. We will fight you to the end!"

Kan Lam leaned close to the cage. "Talk all you want now. The first thing we will do will be to tear out that tongue of yours. Of course, Gao Zhang might be more merciful if you give up the names of your comrades in the Golden Candle Society."

"Hah. There are too many of us to name!"

The Imperial Guardsman shook his head. "Very well, we've tarried long enough. Bring the horses and cart. We leave at once!"

Kan Lam's eunuch lackey turned to carry out his orders, but Li Ling stood in his way.

"What is this?" demanded the magistrate. "Get back in the house, Li Ling!"

"No, father, I can't stand by anymore! You and your masters in the Imperial City only have your self-interests in mind! People like Gan Wei and Auntie Lin suffer because of people like you and Kan Lam!"

The gathered townspeople murmured their amazement at Li Ling's words. None had dared to speak up against the government until now.

"How dare you mutter such rubbish in my town! You want me to lose face before the whole town?" Li Ling's father rushed forward to strike her.

"'I go down to the lily pond
In the beauty of the spriiiiingtime!
Birds are singing and the frogs croak
Children fly their colorful kiiiiites!'"

The magistrate froze in his tracks. "What is that AWFUL noise?!?" he groaned.

The Singing Swordsman leaped to the rescue! His flashing blade cut the rope suspending the cage from the tree, and the wicker bars broke as the cage crashed to the ground. Yong Fo struggled to get up, but his arms and legs were in chains.

"Goh! What are you doing, you fool?"

"Saving you, teacher! Can you run?"

Kan Lam laughed. "Where will you run? My archers and eunuchs surround you! Hahahahaha!"

The Swordsman's eyes gleamed with defiance. "Bring them on!"

Meanwhile, the magistrate confronted his daughter. "Is this the man who has filled your head with such nonsense?"

"He opened my eyes to the truth! He may not sing well, but his heart's in the right place! Which is more than I can say about you! I'm ashamed to be your daughter!"

The magistrate tried to slap her, but she caught his hand in midstroke, and pushed him away angrily. He glared at her, then fled.

"Archers!" shouted Kan Lam.

Arrows filled the air.

"'Iron And Silk!'" The Singing Swordsman pulled out his silk scarf and twirled it in the air with incredible speed, catching all the arrows in it.

Kan Lam drew his sword and attacked. "'Rage Of The Dragon's Fire Tongue!'"

"'Eight Path Dance Of Avoidance!'"

"'Eagle Blade Technique!' I'll get you yet!"

"'Soaring Cloud Leap!' How about a song?"

"'The Mighty Phoenix Chasing Mongrel Dog!' Don't you dare!"

"'Tra la la la la, I love my sword like a brother!/Tra la la la la, your father never met your mother!'"

"Cease your revolting singing!"

"Make me! 'Lai la lai la lai!'"

The two warriors crossed swords fifty times, evenly matched, neither able to break the other's defences. They leaped and soared, fighting all around the village square, jumping onto rooftops and duelling across them.

The Lotus archers struggled to get a clear line of fire, aiming at the leaping swordsman. Finally Kan Lam gave up the chase.

"Shoot him down!"

"No you don't!" shouted Li Ling, overturning a cart full of fruit onto the nearest archer. He stumbled and fell against the next archer, and the whole line tumbled like dominoes, their arrows going wild.

"Incompetent fools!" roared Kan Lam, pulling an arrow out of his leg.

A white-garbed eunuch raised his arms.

"Look out for his magical fire!" shouted Yong Fo to his student.

A white mist rose around the eunuch, and his spell fizzled. "Huh?" he said. Then a bamboo staff knocked him upside the head, and Auntie Lin emerged from the mist, smiling. She was dressed in red robes, and an aura of power surrounded her.

"Who is this?" asked one of the remaining eunuchs.

"I am Sorceress Lin, agent of the Hidden Empress, and I'm here to help free Yong Fo! Just try and avoid my Discerning Fire!"

The remaining eunuchs vanished in a blaze of energy. Li Ling's jaw dropped. "Auntie Lin?"

"Your eunuchs are gone, Imperial Guard," said The Singing Swordsman as he helped Yong Fo to his feet. "Now we're walking out of here and nobody's going to stop us."

"Not while I'm alive!" Kan Lam leaped, attempting to impale Yong Fo with his sword.

The Singing Swordsman threw Yong Fo out of the way, and drew a second sword. "'Twin Spinning Swords Of Legend!'" He whirled around, slashing with both swords. Kan Lam screamed as he was mortally wounded. As he fell to the ground, he muttered: "Th-that technique...oughta be banned..."

Suddenly, Kan Lam's fallen sword grew a mouth and fangs on its hilt, and leaped into the air to avenge its fallen master. It shrieked shrilly as it attacked the Swordsman. At the last second, Lin chanted a magical spell and another white mist surrounded the sword, stripping it of its powers. It fell to the ground, lifeless.

Yong Fo gave a thankful nod to Lin, then addressed the villagers. "People of the good village Jing, you have been trodden on by the rich and powerful for too long. Come with us, and join our secret rebellion! We can help you find new identities, in other provinces. Together we can defeat the corruption that threatens all of China!"

The Singing Swordsman wiped the rotten fruit off Yong Fo's head as the horse cart rattled on the north road. "I guess they're not brave enough to join the movement. I don't blame them; they just want to be left alone."

Behind him, Li Ling took one last look at the village she once called home. "I can't believe I was once like them. I used to think people like you were bandits and brigands."

"It's a ray of hope, seeing you find your inner strength," said Lin. "Now, do you want to come with me to Dragon Mountain, or do you want to follow Yong Fo and the Swordsman to meet this Quan Lo fellow?"

"I think I'll come with you, Auntie Lin. You're the closest I have to family, and I do want to meet this Hidden Empress you mentioned." She turned to the Swordsman. "I guess this is where we part ways."

The Swordsman and Yong Fo, free of his chains, leaped off the cart. The Swordsman flashed one of his crazy grins. "I'm sure you'll miss my company, beautiful Li Ling."

"Not as much as your singing," she laughed.

It was the time of the Lotus, a time of heroes and legends...

Last modified: May 12, 1996;